Asked how to write executive summaries by some poor sap misdirected enough to think he's appealing to some kind of actual authority, Guy Kawasaki does what any Stanford educated, former dot-comer Bono would do. He copy-pastes work someone else has already done (poorly). At least this time he cites the work (you're making progress since that whole "Bozo Explosion" theft, Guy), but that's probably only because it is a buddy-ole-pal who he lifted the material from in the first place.
To learn how to write a two-paged, one page executive summary of the sort that would cause me not only throw it out before I hit the first half-page mark, but also set up a permanent junk-mail filter on the off chance I might potentially be the recipient of even one more piece of blithering nonsense that might conceivably one day emanate from the sender, investigate his post here. Thank god I'm not in the venture business or I might have to actually subject myself to the vomitous creations of Guy's many deluded disciples.
Don't despair if your expertly crafted teaser doesn't create any interest. You can still rely on Guy to teach you how to put together roving ticker-tapes of the many pictures memorializing the numerous expense account funded sporting event outings you attend in the many hours you are not working on actually creating value for some shareholder or limited partner somewhere. Excellent! Your site looks just like Vegas (or perhaps the Morgan Stanley building in Times Square) now!
I know I'm mud slinging. I can't help it. I keep trying to ignore Kawasaki, but his book-buddy sponsoring, self-promoting drivel is inflated with such dot-com era hype that it is impossible to avoid hitting links to the university of pure vapidity that is his American Cheese laden site. It repeatedly sneaks up in the midst of real content like a kind of bird flu-like, viral, context driven keyword ad. And then it just slaps you in the face with the undaunting gaudiness of its lack of substance. It lacks substance with such clarity and perfection that it is actually offensive to those who place even a moderate value on substance. It is operational anti-matter. Everything that is anathema to even the basic concept of "operational excellence."
That weblog is like a construction crew outside your window on a Saturday morning. Relentlessly annoying, smelly, gratingly loud, on union wages, totally out of touch with the rest of the world and, despite producing nothing but chipped concrete, corrosive dust and the occasional cut phone line, somehow possessed of the misguided view that early morning noise, in sufficient quantity, will be mistaken for hard work and competence. And, you know, I suppose that if I were going to tap someone to tell me how to pen a teaser it would be an individual from a firm with a track record at least slightly more significant than that possessed by the Garage California Entrepreneurs Fund, LP.
Have I sufficiently expressed my view yet?
Perhaps I'm hard on Guy. At least he has, for the moment, stopped blowing his own French Horn by signing his posts with the exotic locale he wrote them in. "Posted from a flight to Bradula, Africa." Perhaps he's been sitting quietly in San Jose for the last several weeks. No wonder he stopped. Who wants to brag about sitting idle in San Jose? Let the good times roll!
Again, I need the Midol. Guy gives me cramps.